Monday, April 27, 2009

One year has passed!

Oh my Lord! One year has passed since I decided to start a blog & then I lost it! the blog that much for my blogging career.
God has moved so much this last year in all areas of my life. Where to start.....I believe one of the biggest areas that God touched me in was once again in the 'unbelievable selfishness' of my life. Having written that, I want to clarify that it is not said in condemnation but in the gracious conviction that God has shown in my life. God continues to show such mercy & grace and in His loving dealings with me, my eyes have been opened just a smidgen enough for me to deal with this following subject.............I do not want to die.
I am not afraid of dieing - I am confident & secured in my relationship with my Saviour Jesus Christ, yet I don't want to die. I know that when my times comes to be with Jesus, He will take good care of my husband & son, of the rest of my family (I know this, because I have experienced His loving peace under those circumnstances). Yet, I don't want to die...... I want to be here to share life with my family, my family needs me! My family can live without me but my family needs me & I need my family. It is selfish of me to not take care of my health so that I can have a fulfilling/high quality life with my family. It is selfish of me to want to be with Jesus Christ before my time. It is my desire to be with Jesus.....but in His time & it is my duty to take care of my health so that my life here can be lived to the extent that God has for me.
That revelation was the greatest revelation of the past 12 months - and I am on my way to better health, walking, taking my medication & making wise choices.